Bouncing Back from Rejection After a Job Interview

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Successfully breaking into the legal profession can be a challenge for even the most capable candidates. The simple truth is that almost every aspiring solicitor is likely to get at least one or two knock-backs when applying for qualifying work experience be that a training contract, paralegal role or other recognised placements.

Receiving that dreaded rejection email or phone call can be an unpleasant experience that leaves you feeling dejected and disheartened. But no matter how hard, it’s really important to get back on the horse as quickly as possible. Especially, because if you allow a rejection to shatter your confidence chances are that it will adversely impact your performance at future interviews and hence the significance of breaking the potential for a vicious cycle to dominate your job search. The key therefore is to use every unsuccessful interview as a learning opportunity and to make relevant adjustments to break the deadlock as soon as possible.

If a rejection email does make its way into your inbox below are a few simple pointers to help you quickly bounce back and help you remain positive, optimistic and motivated.

  1. Don’t take it personally and gain perspective.  Some jobs just aren’t meant to be, and no matter how hard you try there are certain factors that are simply beyond your control. This might include a strong internal candidate who is already known to the employer or an external candidate who has marginally more relevant experience than you. What’s more, you may have even dodged a bullet.
  2. When it comes to an unsuccessful job application, asking for feedback is a given. The difficulty, however, is that the amount of detail a hiring organisation goes into when explaining their decision can be patchy at best. Therefore, it’s just as important for you to spend time self-reflecting on how you thought the interview went. Indeed, it’s really good practice after every interview to keep detailed notes of what was covered and how you performed, including any potential room for improvement such as tweaking answers at potential future interviews.
  3. Ask a family member, friend or close contact for their honest evaluation of your interview style as well. The key here is to determine what’s holding you back? The content of your answers or your delivery? Both can be sharpened with more preparation and practice.
  4. Make relevant adjustments to address the issues highlighted in your own self-assessment as well as any other feedback you’ve received. Often the reason for not being able to convert an interview into a job offer is a lack of preparation (or indeed over-preparation resulting in answers coming across as forced).
  5. Be realistic, manage your own expectations and consider re-setting your definition of success.  As has already been highlighted above, the legal profession is a tough nut to crack. What’s more, the pandemic hasn’t helped matters meaning it’s likely to take longer to secure a suitable job offer. So, be patient and avoid being too hard on yourself.

Banishing negative thought patterns

A string of back-to-back rejections can risk some candidates dramatising or overstating how bad their situation actually is. Unless, appropriately managed, such a negative thought can turn into an unhelpful thinking pattern, which in turn can hold you back from reaching your full potential.

Before discussing how to banish negative thought patterns let’s go through a few more:

  1. Mental filtering – Only focussing on the negative stuff when presented with a mass of information. For example, thinking a short gap on your CV makes you a rubbish candidate, even though you have stellar academics and plenty of relevant work experience.
  2. Crystal ball gazing – Talking to ourselves as if we know what the future holds. For instance, there’s no point in applying to City law firms because I didn’t go to Oxbridge and I’m too old.
  3. Mind reading – Assuming we know what others are thinking (usually about us!).
  4. All or Nothing / Black & White thinking – This way of thinking allows for no middle ground. For example, if an interview didn’t go perfectly it was a ‘complete failure’. If a presentation didn’t go brilliantly it was rubbish.
  5. Overgeneralising and exaggerating the specific facts – For example, after burning some toast thinking you’re rubbish at cooking or a date stands you up and you decide that you’re hopeless in love.
  6. Compare and despair – Seeing the good and positive in other students and getting upset when comparing ourselves negatively against them.
  7. Emotional reasoning – Interpreting negative feelings as evidence of the facts/truths about yourself or situation. For example, I feel guilty so I must be in the wrong or I feel anxious so I must be in danger.
  8. Critical self – Putting ourselves down, self-criticism, blaming ourselves for events or situations that aren’t totally our responsibility.
  9. Shoulds and musts – Putting ourselves under unnecessary pressure and setting unrealistic expectations by thinking or saying: “I should (or “I shouldn’t”) or “I must”.
  10. Judgements – Making evaluations or judgements about events, ourselves, others or the world instead of describing what we actually see and have evidence for.

To help you challenge a negative thought it is worth questioning how valid/true/rational it is. You can do this by asking yourself some of the following questions, which should offer an alternative perspective.

  • Am I thinking in one of the unhelpful patterns listed above?
  • Is this unhelpful thought a fact? What evidence do I have to support this? What is the evidence against it?
  • Do I have enough information to reach this conclusion? And has this information been fact-checked?
  • Am I asking myself unanswerable questions such as “Why me”?
  • Am I being fair to myself?
  • Am I trying to predict the future? If so, how likely is it that my prediction will happen? If it does happen, what would help me to manage the situation?
  • What are the alternative interpretations of the situation?
  • What are the likely consequences of this situation?
  • If a friend was struggling with this, what would I say to them?
  • How is this way of thinking helping me to manage the situation in question?
  • What similar situations from the past will help me to think in an alternative and more helpful way?

Once you’ve evaluated and challenged your thoughts and substituted them with more positive, or at the very least more rational and objective ones you’ll hopefully feel some emotional relief. But this won’t happen overnight and will need to be learned and practised. So, please try to stick with it.

 

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